Thursday, April 21, 2011

The Agony of Jesus

Did you know the word "agony" appears only one time in the King James Bible?  I didn't.

When I read this today, I was surprised.  I checked my Strong's Concordance to ensure the accuracy of the statement and, sure enough, there on page 28 in the concordance, listed only once, was agony. 

The Greek word for agony is agonia meaning a struggle (properly in Greek, the state of being in a struggle) or figuratively anguish or agony.  Agonia derives from agon which means conflict, effort or contention.

It seems obvious that this word is more than just "agony" in the English meaning - it is a struggle filled with anguish and conflict and contention.

So where is it that this one word appears in the Bible?  It appears in Luke 22:44, but let's look at the entire passage to get the full story behind this one scripture and allow me to set up the scene.

Jesus has just shared the last supper with the twelve disciples and has told the disciples one of them will betray him.  Now, after the meal has ended, Jesus, with His disciples following, goes to the garden to pray.  Here are the scriptural passages that follow:

Luke 22:41-44
And Jesus was withdrawn from them about a stone's throw and kneeled down and prayed, saying,
 "Father, if thou be willing, remove this cup from me: nevertheless not my will, but thine, be done."
And there appeared an angel unto him from heaven, strengthening him.  And being in agony he prayed more earnestly: and his sweat was as it were great drops of blood falling down to the ground.

My study Bible adds this note:
Jesus is borne up in His hour of greatest need, when He must intercede not only for Himself but for His followers, who are about to leave Him in the lurch.  Agony appears only here in the New Testament: it points to the intensity of Jesus' struggle.  Surely Jesus wrestles, not so much with death itself, but with His own destiny to be made the sin-bearer for all mankind for all the ages.  The punishment that had to be borne for our sins brings Jesus to His knees in anguish.

Jesus knew His destiny and knew what was coming and He struggled in agony and anguish over it.  He even prays for the "removal of this cup" from his path, but then adds "not my will, but thine, be done."  As many times as I have read this passage, today is the first time that I understand the agony of Jesus in this moment.

This week I have struggled with a personal issue - one that has born anger and hatred within me for more than a decade.  Today, a particular event brought that anger and hatred to a head and I found myself weeping with complete and utter frustration.  I am helpless in these circumstances and so I must surrender to them, but my heart resists with clenched fists.

In my frustration I turned to my husband, my mother and my Bible for comfort.  I was blessed by the conversations with my husband and mother and then further blessed by my Bible in coming into this knowledge today regarding agony.

The Lord knows my struggle (He knows yours too) and has offered me comfort in showing me more clearly the agony of His own struggle as He walked to the cross on my (and your) behalf.  I am truly humbled.

I've wiped away my tears and I'm wiping away my anger and hatred one small swipe at a time.  It's a process - I get that - one that I have agreed to and one that I am surrendering to one unclenched finger at a time.

Sunday, April 10, 2011

Threads

Threads

Life is like an intricately woven fabric
made up of many different threads.

Some threads are prominent only in some areas
having distinct starting and stopping points.

Other threads dot the fabric throughout.

While others still form the very foundation
of the cloth itself being constant for as long
as the threads have length to give.

The threads no matter how used serve only
one purpose: to make up the whole.

Only the Master Weaver knows the final
design of the cloth and only in His hands 
will the threads find their place.

As each day passes it is my joy to admire
the work of the Master who so cleverly weaves
the threads of my life together.

Sunday, March 20, 2011

Answer Well

Answer Well

I weep for what was

Yearning for comfort I reminisce
and remember

If allowed, 
I could stay here a very long time

But the past holds not my potential
only lessons that
when practiced
prepare me more

For the joys ahead and 
the sorrows yet to come

How will I live my life yet lived?

The future is determined in
the smallness of each moment's choice

What shall I carry?
What shall I leave behind?
What shall I cherish?
What shall I protect?

In each moment
With each choice
We answer the questions
of life

Answer carefully.
Answer lovingly.
Answer well.

Saturday, January 1, 2011

Pages from 2010 Life Book

In April 2009 I purchased a Fabriano Venezia Book, a delightful sketchbook filled with wonderful Fabriano watercolor paper.

Incredibly, I wrote on a few pages in 2009 and then put the book down and didn't touch it again for more than a year.

Luckily, I picked it back up on August 4, 2010 and I haven't put it down since.

This book has become so much more than a sketchbook - it really is my "Life Book"... a sketchbook, journal, scrapbook and photo album all in one.

Here are some of my favorite pages since that wonderful day in August and, I'm happy to report, I have a brand new Venezia Book for 2011!

Feliz Año Nuevo!!

-- Kristin






Monday, April 5, 2010

Forever In Your Eyes

Forever In Your Eyes

How beautiful I feel when
you caress and hold me close
How wonderful it is to be
the one you love the most

How is it that you found me
so lost and all alone?
How is it that you left behind
the place you called your home?

How will I ever thank you
for loving me so much
There's nothing I desire more
but to simply feel your touch

I know our love's forever
the world can keep its lies
Because I can see forever
when I look into your eyes

Monday, March 8, 2010

Hope

My latest work-in-progress... another Versals lettering with Celtic knots.  The letters are bigger this time, which allows me to paint the inside spaces with watercolor.  I'm trying to decide if I want all the letters blue or not.  I'm thinking an alternative could be to fade to magenta with a pretty purple in the middle.  What do you think?

Saturday, March 6, 2010

Majestic Redwood Tree

During the last camping trip in my camper, I painted a majestic Redwood tree that was on the camp site.  I had forgotten about this watercolor until recently when I was going through all my sketchbooks. Unfortunately, my scanner is not big enough to capture the entire work, but most of it is in the scan.

I really miss my camper.

Painted October 24, 2009.